From what I see, BDI is right, the stake spots were not drilled out and the threads are damaged. An experienced shock rebuilder would have seen that and known it would not stay sealed. I think BDI's plan to just find a used shock and start over, is also the fastest way to get back out riding. No reason to get mad or make accusations, just decide on the fastest way to get it fixed and focus on that. Your shock rebuilder will probably help in this process, if you dont piss him off.
Happy Easter, hope your bike is back together soon.
John